1. Re-writing the voice in my head. That little lady in there is the first thing that can ultimately throw off my energy because I spend all day every day with her. And yes, I do hear that voice in the third-person at times (I can't be the only one haha). So here is the thing about that voice. It is either going to announce your fear or your faith, it is up to you to program which one. To re-write the script that this voice recites, it takes changing the energy of your thoughts. For example, every time you pay a bill, write a cheque or have to cover an unexpected expense say "thank you for making more room in my account for a greater abundance to flow in" instead of "Oh my god, life is expensive, I'm going to stay broke, I can never catch a break". The more you catch those words of doubt and fear and switch them to knowing and believing, the more you are raising your vibration to a place where your life resonates with you and all that you are. In the same concept, stay 6 feet post-covid from people that play and stay in Victim Mode. That is some of the most contagious energy (in a virus spreading way). There is a reason those who believe that bad continues to happen to them or they have "terrible luck"... keep experiencing more of it. Keep their words fair from your process of re-writing yours.
2. Replace every drainer with a feeder.
Drainer: getting drunk every weekend. Feeder: resting and reading a book that has been sitting on your shelf for a year.
Drainer: binge eating chicken nuggets and binging a whole season on Netflix in one sitting. Feeder: slapping on a face mask, drinking water and having a self-care day while listening to meditation music.
Drainer: Texting your ex just to get gaslit and then ghosted again. Feeder: deleting the contact.
I think you get my drift on what this looks like. And trust me, it looks different for everyone.
3. Stop doing things that repeatedly do not feel good. Seems simple right? Well, as humans we have a real "sucker for punishment" tendency, as especially in this era of hustle and grind, we associate success with sacrificing. Now, there is a certain trade-off that is inevitable. I would love to sleep for 10 hours every night, but my business arguably would suffer. Some of us (me, I am some of us), also have a real habit of fixating on the potential of things and overlooking how shitty they feel right now and repeatedly. If you find yourself continuing being a "fixer"/"healer" and not realizing it is at the expense of your happiness, then this is you. Seeing long-term and how great something could be if we stick with it, is an awesome skill set when applied correctly. For example, I don't exactly love doing cardio, and well it doesn't always feel good in the moment. But, I am able to see it's "potential" and how it can benefit me. On the flip side, holding onto the potential of this guy and what he could become, despite every single red flag he is showing and how bad he currently makes you feel, is not applying it correcting. Trust me, your girl had to learn the difference in application. Once learned, this saved me a whole lot of continually doing things that did not feel good. Instant vibration lifter.
4. Get out the phone and into reality. Phew, this one. There are many perks to these little necessary evil devices we hold onto 24/7 of every day (I say this because I even use my phone for the Calm app to fall asleep at night, the device co-dependency is real). However, the complete need for our phones has created a real grey area or disconnect, if you will, in trade of this digital form of "connection". In the most literal form of this, I have run into or taken out my pinky toe on the edge of furniture, while looking down and trying to answer three emails, post to Instagram, pretend to not see texts that I will forget to respond to in three days, and set five reminders. The vortex of my iPhone literally pulls me out of a moment and then I come back out into reality 15 minutes later wondering where time went. The illest form of distraction and procrastination, and the realest form of knowing "too much" while always feeling FOMO. The other form of "non-reality" that the phone has created is a by-product of social media. It literally takes active reminders to "not care" to remain unaffected after taking a 10 min scroll through Instagram or TikTok. This is the whole "knowing too much" side of things. Comparison, judgement, selective presentation of one's life (the highlight reel that isn't so real), unsolicited advice, and click bait clout are just to name a few vibration fuckeries (sorry mom), that go on. My point is, if you are concerned about what type of radiation your phone might be giving off, then you should be highly concerned over the energy transfer you are getting from using it every single day. Getting someone's Petty Betty energy rubbed off on you and potentially ruining your day isn't just an in person thing. You can get caught in that cross-fire by way of scrolling and lingering a little too long. As I have talked about before, make your usage intentional, curate what you follow and absorb carefully, and create a very clear sense of reality that does not depend on something that stops working to make you go buy a new one. I could do a whole Ted Talk on this, so I shall leave you on those words for now.
5. Strategize your stress response. Stress happens, there is no avoiding some situations. But, there is a whole crisis management team within yourself that you can put in place for when these situation pop up at inopportune times. For example, when something sets off the "stress alarm" my sequence of events is as follows;
- Take a deep breath and step outside of the current situation to look in at it clearly.
- Take a solution based approach at looking at the situation at hand, rather than fixation on the problem itself.
- Identify and manage my emotional response; "what am I feeling?", "is what I am feeling being triggered by a previous experience that I have not addressed?", "why am I feeling stressed about this/what significance does this have in the bigger picture of my life and everything I am grateful for?"
- Understand the timeline and give myself space in between. Rome wasn't built in a day, and I don't need to solve everything overnight. Sometimes appreciating the patience of it all will give the space and allow what is meant to happen to take it's course.
- Use the situation to explore alternative approaches. I call these the hurdles to create necessary detours. In my lifetime I have experienced more growth and gain from the unforeseen rerouting of my internal GPS than the planned course I had previously intended to take. This is why I always embrace the idea that some stresses are avoided by not being so married to the ideas I once had, and rather being open to receive what is happening. Coming from a classic Type A, this letting go of control is integral in my overall stress response.
6. Sleep. Meditate. Stillness. You remember to plug in your phone when the battery gets low, but can't treat your body the same? Come on now, don't make me virtually slap you with that sentence. Sit with it, own it. The power that is found in learning to rest is one you will only find when you switch your mentality from viewing rest as being different from being lazy. It took me such a long time to switch this mindset as my Instagram feed was bombarded with the Gary V's of the world yelling "if you want to be rich you can't sleep". I felt like I was caught in this invisible rat race of seeing who was doing the most and resting the least to measure where I was at on a ladder of success (that literally doesn't exist because it is relative to how you define success). Everything about this is so wrong. The quickest way to a burn out and bottom out your immune system is to drive yourself into such a deficit that you are no longer mindful or connected to what you are doing every day. There is such a gap between simply being lazy and resting, and if are not connected to yourself and listen to an Instagram personality, such as Gary V, more than your own self, then you surely will fail at differentiating between the two things.
7. Say no. Stop being available to everyone all the time. It is literally the equivalent of driving a friend where they need to go, leaving your lights on in your car, no one telling you they are on, and coming back to your car the next morning to realize the battery is dead. I am not saying to be a 'hard to get along' with friend, but I am saying to be slightly more in tune with something called reciprocity. As a chronic 'yes-man' Canadian, it took me six years of living in LA to learn this one. I had to jump-start this metaphorical car several times, just because I felt bad for saying no. So reciprocity is as simple as it sounds. If someone matches your high energy, then you can give them that energy back. In fact, it becomes this beautiful little energy circuit, that just continues to feed itself (science!). I literally despise the saying "match their energy" in reference to someone being shitty to you. Absolutely NO (see I am getting better at flinging that word around, eh?). Do not lower your energy to meet their low vibrational energy, because then you have to do all the work all over again to brush that off and elevate back to your equilibrium of positivity. Instead, meet what meets you. And therefore, what finds you is meant for you. Sometimes a NO is needed to remain aligned. Go on friend, take your power back.
8. Learn what recharges you. What fills your cup back up? You see, in life our cup is going to get knocked, we will spill some, we will pour from our cup into others, at times we will have a hole in the cup (trust me I have been there in life before). But, end of the day, we are responsible to fill our cup back up. That is completely on you. You cannot sit around and wait for someone else to fill your cup back up, because then your thirst is dependent on when they feel like quenching it. This is your cup baby, and how you fill it is by doing those things that fulfill you. For me, those things look like going for walks in nature, sitting in the sun, tending to my plants, listening to a really thoughtfully curated playlist, laughing with friends until my face hurts, eating hummus until my stomach hurts, and traveling in this big and beautiful world.
9. Be the observer. You can see more when you are at bird's eye view versus sea level. Ever since I heard this saying, I take the path of the bird. Everything we know we have been taught, heard, or saw from our POV. That means life as we know it is simply how we receive it. You can take the same route to work every single day and see the exact same things. Or, you can make a new turn, drive a bit slower and roll your window down and hear the birds you never knew sat at the tree at the street corner. Everything you once knew about that drive changed in the moment you decided to approach it differently. That is why I will never act like I know everything, that my opinion or "repeated" knowledge is correct and the only way something can be, or close myself off to hearing someone else's point of view. I realize that how I have seen particular people or situations in my life has been altered due to my previous experiences (some might also refer to some of this altering POV as trauma, baggage, etc). The internet has truly made people feel like their perspective is being constantly attacked or up for debate. Instead think of enjoying the process of seeing things from different perspectives so you can have a well-rounded approach at life. Just as when you travel and get to see other parts of the world and how others live, speak, eat, and spend their time, apply that to your daily approach of life. I promise you your energy will only elevate.
10. Food + Exercise = Good Ass Energy. I know they probably skipped over that equation in math class, but when I tell you it is probably the most important one for you to remember, I mean it. Everything that goes into your body affects your energy, because it IS energy, so the source matters. Every time we move our body we expend energy, preventing stagnant energy. Negative or traumatic energy can literally become stored in our body. If you have every experienced a physical energy release through a deep tissue massage you know the truth behind this. I have experienced this when getting my upper back worked on and I uncontrollably started laughing and crying like the scene out of The Joker. The massage therapist then comforted and confirmed to me that was stored energy I needed to release. This also can happen through regular movement of the body when working out. Viewing food as an energy source to fuel our body instead of this enemy that controls your body is such an important mental shift. Every time I eat something, I feel gratitude over how healthy it is as it will nourish my body and help me become better and feel better everyday.
I hope this helps. Now go elevate to infinity and beyond.
Catch My Energy,