The Human's Guide to Flourishing

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The Human's Guide to Flourishing

 

flourish /ˈfləriSH/

"(of a person, animal, or other living organism) grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, especially as the result of a particularly favorable environment."
 

 

Why the word flourishing holds so much value is because to me it is the word that truly defines what we are all meant to do in our own unique capacity as an individual. Yes, my love for plants and nature also has an influence over this word in my vocabulary, because in my eyes there is so much to be learned about life itself from life forms such as plants. Nature has it figured out it my opinion, humans just tend of overcomplicate the basic elements of what it is to be... what it is to flourish.

So, you could say sitting in quarantine with my home looking like a jungle, led to a deeper level of understanding at plant level. The more time I spent in nature, the more I really understood what in my life I had to un-learn, and what I had to further learn to really clear my own path to my highest potential. Also, in my profession, I deal with people and their own unique journeys on a daily basis. Let's face it, a personal trainer is someone to guide you through your mental realm to lead you to progress in your physical realm. Or as I like to say, I help navigate you on the path of reconnecting with you. The greatest common challenge shared amongst the hundreds of clients I have trained over the last 11 years has been exactly that, a disconnect of self. Those disconnects can look like, self-sabotaging habits that just enable the belief they cannot change, a negative relationship with food and how it makes them feel, patterns of placing oneself in environments that they cannot progress within, and more. All of these things are widening the gap that is the disconnect. In my 20's I went through a roller coaster of life and really experienced first hand, the mental, physical, and spiritual consequences of what living in disconnect feels like. No matter what I did, how hard I was trying, I felt like my growth was stunted. I know the frustration of this feeling and so it has always been my goal to help others identify, un-learn and flourish.

 

 The Humans Guide To Flourishing:

1. Observe Your Environment

If you place a plant in a very tiny pot, it will only ever be able to grow to the size of that pot. Eventually its roots will get bound so tightly in that pot that it will start to die. What is the lesson you should take from this? Getting too comfortable, too complacent and remaining in an environment you have out-grown a long time ago, is the death to all progress. A lot of people confuse fear with comfort, comfort with being logical or "smart", and stagnant energy with consistency. If you are not careful fear will have you in an environment for you entire life that was never meant for you. So right now observe your environment. Your environment includes your home, your city, your things, the people around you, the music you listen to, the path you take to work, your social media newsfeed, the TV shows you watch, the conversations you listen to. We absorb our environment through all of our senses and those senses effect us subconsciously every single day. It is up to us to make the conscious and aware decisions of how those things make us feel. Are they serving you? Are they supporting your growth? Or are these things energetically shifting you into a place that you cannot truly flourish in? I know placing yourself into a new environment can be scary, but you HAVE to give yourself the opportunity and space to grow. One of the rules I live by is to always level up. In every single thing I do, I allow room for progression, and never accept regression as an option. Even if I do not feel quite ready, I place myself there so I have to get ready. If I want to get a new place, I will order a piece of furniture that won't fit where I currently live so I HAVE to get a larger space. Not only do I constantly select a bigger pot to grow in, I make sure I have to make that transition. 

2. Get Proper Nutrients

In my book, Un-Diet, I said one of the greatest flaws in the average individuals nutrition is that they overeat and are underfed. This is true for the context in which I am referring to nutrients here as well. In this context, nutrients are everything we consume. That can be the food we eat, the perspectives we internalize, and the thoughts we think. To me this is the composition of our energy. Nutrients are what feeds our vibration, if you will. They do say, you are what you eat. If a plant does not have the basic form of nutrients in the soil, water and sunlight, it will die. If a plant is given too much of these things, or things it simply cannot use, it will die. Humans are constantly overeating yet underfed. We are bombarded on a daily basis of things we do not need or cannot even use, yet made to believe that we want it. If you are so distracted by overconsumption you cannot even see that you are missing the basic nutrients you need to not only exist but to flourish. In a world of useless flexing on Instagram, remember it is not about quantity, it is about quality. There are a lot of hungry people posting full plates.

3. Water Yourself

My favorite self-care mantra is that you cannot pour from an empty cup. I think helping others is a beautiful thing. And I truly believe that humans are not different than any other living being on Earth in that they are designed to be synergistic. I repeat, synergist not parasitic. As I am sure you can relate to, I have had some real parasites in my past, who constantly sucked the life out of me. If someone or something leaves you feeling like your energy is drained or negatively affected, that means they are not for you. It is literally the equivalent to continually pouring water into your bucket that someone else is poking holes into and draining your water into their bucket. As hard as you try you will never be able to fill it. With that being said I ask you, how do you expect to grow if all your energy is going to filling your forever draining bucket? You will not only serve your highest self but you will be able to be a positive and helpful person in other people's lives if you make sure YOU are good first. Selfish is avoiding introspective self work and constantly putting your shit on others. Selfish is NOT taking the time you need to better yourself. Always remember to be patient with yourself and others as this process of watering yourself looks different for everyone. But also remember, you cannot pause life, you need to figure out how to both heal, learn, un-learn and grow while living and co-existing. Because if not, you may miss out on some beautiful things. It is all in the balance baby. 

4. Spread Your Roots, Stay Grounded

This beautiful world is so big yet so small. And now more than ever we have the tools to spread our roots vastly. There is so much to grow from in life as the student. Meeting new people, learning from different ages, cultures and places in the world can truly give you perspectives that can unlock parts of yourself that you didn't know existed. Your energy was made to be felt, never shrink yourself to fit in just because you are unaware of what is out there. I believe that when passion meets purpose is when you are on the path of your most authentic self. The second most important part is to stay grounded. Always know how to find your center. That means when everything around you that is outside of your control feels chaotic, you can find your peace and ground your energy because you know your center. For some people this is found through meditation, while others it is turning off their phone and listening to a really good playlist. You are always in your control, never forget that. The more aware you become of your own energy, the more you will be able to recognize when it needs to be recalibrated. 

5. Unapologetically Grow

This I saved for last because it is the point that I want you to leave you with and make sure you never forget. Copy this next sentence and put it in the notes section in your phone. Your growth owes no one an explanation. There is a huge difference between living for others and living controlled by others. My family is my heart, my everything, but at no time has my growth been a problem to them. Quite the opposite, they support every single decision that I have made in order to grow. You should never feel guilty if you are living in your authentic self in motion. Your authentic self is always going to progress, grow and change, that is why we exist in motion. If at any point that is making you feel guilty or someone is making you feel uncomfortable, I urge you to repeat the sentence above. If you are the one who is feeling uncomfortable by your growth, then I urge you to find the root of this feeling. As long as you are being authentic, not hurting others, and on your progressive path, you should grow on, and unapologetically so. There is a reason you see fields of flowers, forests and jungles. Life is meant to be beautiful, growth is meant to be endless, and we are all deserving to flourish. 

 

Catch my energy,

Em